In Friday's Chicago Tribune, our own Alderman was featured, with photos and all. The best part was the Morse Hell Hole style photos, you don't get the photos on-line, you have to spend 50 cents and buy the paper. The one with the Aldermans shoe in the pot hole is a classic! The Alderman actually taking notes isn't bad either.
But....The story should have gone like this.
Driving down the side streets in his North Side ward, Ald. Joe Moore (49th) gripped the steering wheel of his maroon 1994 Ford Taurus and felt the bumpiness on a stretch of Columbia Avenue. His assessment? "Where am I going to park"?
"We'll let this block go for another year... if I can't find a place to park." He tried parking his car but couldn't find a spot, so he marked Columbia off his list of streets to visit.
"Look at that," Moore said, driving around another block in his ward for what seemed like the 10th time, "No parking. I trained myself to keep quiet about the lack of parking everywhere in my ward but I'm getting dizzy".
"It's really not rocket science. You just drive around, and when you see a spot you take it quickly before someone else gets it." Even when the spots are tight like..( a crunch can be heard )... this one"..... At this point Alderman Moore bumps into a parked car.
He parked his car and got out to take a closer look at the damage. "This is why I went to college and law school," he said, laughing.
real trib quotes in bold
7 comments:
The following projects were previously funded by the city but will now be charged against an alderman's annual grant.
PROJECTS NEW COST
Diagonal parking $65,000
Any chance of spending some of that money here now? Just think Alderman, the last 10 years... we have been asking for this...and it was free.
It's not rocket science...
You mean should have gone like this:
Craig Pitches Fit on Pooping....
In Friday's Chicago Tribune, our own Craig Gernhardt was featured, with photos and all. The best part was Professional style photos, you don't get the photos on-line, you have to go to Dollar Daze and steal the paper. The one with Craigs shoe in the pile of poop is a classic! Craig
actually shoveling snow isn't bad either.
But....The story should have gone like this.
Walking down the side streets in his North Side ward, Craig Gernhardt, gripping the leashes of his two guard dogs felt the bumpiness on a stretch of Columbia Avenue. His assessment? "Where am I gonna find a story in a pile of dicsarded community flyers?
"We'll let this block go for another year... if I can't find a place where people are dealing drugs. He tried to find a place to set down his Dunkin Doughnuts National Chain Coffee get a pic of graffiti and blame "generally the Ald or DevCorp North" for all of Societies Ills, but there was so much propaganda piled up everywhere he could find no such place, so he marked Morse off his list of streets to visit.
"Look at that," Craig said, walking around another block in his ward for what seemed like the 1000th time, " Morsland " those guys are in Joes pocket. I trained myself to keep quiet about the lack of conspiracy everywhere in my ward but I'm getting dizzy" and Hugh won't let me give up the faith.
"It's really not rocket science. You just walk around, and when you see a person who looks like they may have voted for Joe you take opportunity to quickly educate them about how Joe fashioned the entire political process in this country for his own benefit before someone else gets to them and presents a different SPIN on it."
He parked his dogs and got a close up of a bottle of beer. look at the damage. "This is why I want to get in the news" College and law school, he said are for those who only want to get ahead by diverting SSA dollars to personal slush funds and be able to afford fancy cars like the much coveted 94 Ford Taurus. I bet that baby can do 0-60 in just under the time it takes to accept a campaign contribution from someone who builds buildings for a living!
Eat your "Heart of Rogers Park" out
If we don't laugh were dead....
Florsheim - the Official Shoe of the 49th Ward
Two pair of size 14's a year, except election years where as he gets 200 pair of shoes to trade away for votes.The shoe for votes is a true story. I doubt the shoes are from Florsheim, maybe a dollar store knock off version.
Other famous give-aways include, turkey's at Thanksgiving and the back to school picnic.
> how much money does Florsheim contribute to Moore's campaign?
Here's how to answer such questions for yourself:
Go to the Illinois State Board of Electionshttp://www.elections.state.il.us
Go to their Campaign Disclosure web site
http://www.elections.state.il.us/Cds/pages/statuswelcome.asp
Read the "Guide to Disclosure" (link on the lower left) Familiarize yourself with your right to know.
To start a search, click on "Contributor/Contribution " (link on the left)
Special Instructions for Citizens for Joe Moore While investigating contributions to Citizens for Joe Moore, don't forget to research the donor company and look for contributions from its officers, employees, and attorneys. And don't forget, once you find a contribution, look for other contributions from the same address, so you won't miss other front businesses.
More Special Instructions for Researching Citizens for Joe Moore Campaign Financing While investigating contributions to Citizens for Joe Moore, remember to be careful not to accidentally limit your search to contributions from 60626 or 60645. You will miss most of it.
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